I discovered a strange box on my porch this afternoon:
It was addressed to me, and I did have a birthday last weekend (turning the ripe old age of [REDACTED]), but I must say, I'm a bit mystified. Who the heck would send me a "grow your own portobello mushrooms" kit from the good folks at (I kid you not) Mushroom Adventures? There may be a card inside explaining everything, but the box insists that I not "start" the kit before November 21 (since it is "still maturing" -- a mildly disturbing thought, since as the picture shows, I've let it into my house), and I don't know if opening the box constitutes "starting."
All things considered, quite a mystery.
This is the sort of thing my mom would send. Or maybe one of my nutty aunts (he says with love -- they both know they're nuts, just like the rest of the family, present company included). But for now, I'm soaking in the mysteriousness of my fungal arrival, not wanting to break the spell by calling family and getting some answers.
So, consider this the beginning of Mushroom Countdown '08: This Time, It's Mycological. We're at SIX days and counting to the great unveiling, which (I hope) will have all the grandeur, drama, and military precision of the opening of the Ark of the Covenant scene in Raiders, but without all the Nazis and the face-melting.
Stay tuned, folks! After all, the mystery box promises that growing mushrooms at home is "fun and exciting" -- which makes me mildly concerned, since I knew guys in college who got arrested for growing "fun and exciting" mushrooms at home and going on a little "mushroom adventure".
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