Thursday, December 4, 2008

I've Got Fungus!

Huh. Maybe I'll send that headline back for a rewrite. Of course, Steve F. already stole the fungi/fun guy pun that I was waiting to unleash, so I got nuthin'.

Unappealing as it sounds, my career as a mushroom farmer is off to a thrilling start, at least by mushroom-growing standards.

Harken back to November 21, the date that my box o'shrooms was supposedly going to "mature." Thus, the great unveiling (and pay no attention to that bald spot -- I swear, it's a camera trick):

Knowing that the anticipation may just kill several of my more frail readers (and I can't spare any), I'll cut directly to the big reveal:

That's right... it's a BOX OF DIRT!

At this point, I'm sure you're wishing for smell-enhanced Web access, because who doesn't love the smell of moist mushroom mulch in the morning? Smells like... victory.

Fast forward again (can you handle such an action-packed thrill ride? it's almost as exciting as watching mushrooms grow!) to today, December 4, and you'll see that I now have a...

Wait for it...

wait for it...


A box of DIRT!


Oh, but all you doubters, look again.

Closer.

Closer.

A little bit closer...

That's right. MUSHROOMS!

As Stephen Colbert would say, "I accept your apology."

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