Exorcism

For three days straight, my commute has been marred by a song stuck in my head.

Not just any song, mind you. "Respect Yourself" by Bruce Willis. Yes, a lame one-hit-wonder of the 80s by a TV star attempting to cross over into music -- complete with more irony than anything Alanis Morrisette ever recorded, since Bruce never would have recorded "Respect Yourself" if he'd had a shred of self-respect in the first place.

It's become a self-fulfilling prophecy... I get on the bike and think, "Geez, I wonder if that stupid song is going to get stuck in my head again?" Whammo, there it is.

So, in an attempt to get it out, I'm going to make the rest of you suffer. Please listen to the whole thing in the hopes that it will leave my brain-space for yours. And don't make me give you a pop quiz on the lyrics later to prove that you've done your assignment!




Editor's After-The-Fact Note: Huh, look at that! I guess Bruce Willis and/or his management and/or anyone else who cares about his dignity find this song appropriately humiliating and are attempting to expunge all evidence of it from YouTube. Well, you're off the hook for the quiz, but I would ask that you remember this pearl of wisdom: "If you don't respect yourself, ain't nobody gonna give a good cahoot." And let me tell you, there's just nothing worse than finding yourself stuck with a bad cahoot, or -- heaven forfend -- no cahoot at all.