Milwaukee's Best

As of last Friday, I had never set foot in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. We drove by on the way to our honeymoon in Door County, but never graced MKE with our presence. Friends who've visited and/or lived there said we would like it, and we'd talked about taking a weekend, but the stars just hadn't aligned.

Until last weekend, that is. We were looking for someplace to go to celebrate Carla's second graduation from Drake University (a school so nice, she went there twice) when we realized that The Decemberists (the latest band for whom I've developed a cult-like devotion) were playing up there. Stars? Aligned.

So, now that I'm safely back in my Des Moines nest, here are some of the hits (and a few tiny misses) from a long weekend in the land of the cheeseheads:

THE DOWNTOWN HILTON: Thanks to the random blessing of those name-your-price websites, we ended up in a pretty classy joint. The Milwaukee Hilton is clearly an OLD building that's been kept up over the years. It made for a pretty stylish and comfy home base as we worked our way around the town. How can you not feel important when you're greeted by a guy in a top hat every time you come to the door? I felt like an extra in a film adaptation of The Great Gatsby every time I went through the lobby. Downside? Internet access was $10 a day, which is why The Cycle didn't post live reports from the scene (my thumbs are too fat to use Carla's smartphone). Upside? Walking distance from two of our major attractions, the aforementioned Decemberists concert and the art museum.

MIND-NUMBINGLY GOOD LOCAL COFFEE: I went 3-for-4 on coffee over the weekend (the lone miss was a desperation run to the Starbucks in the Hilton), drinking local brew so good that it made my toes curl. Most notable was Alterra, a Milwaukee chain. The location I visited was right next to a yarn shop, which kept Carla occupied while I downed refill after refill of astonishingly good joe. The monstrous dual roasters looked like something out of science fiction, and it was only the "no customers past this point" chains that kept me from worshiping on the massive steel steps of their twin metallic altars.

THE ONION: Sorry, Des Moines, but you aren't a real city until I can pick up a paper copy of The Onion within your borders. Get on that, please.

BEN'S CYCLE/MILWAUKEE BICYCLE COMPANY: MKE-hip pals on the iBOB mailing list told me that Ben's/MBC was the shop to see, and they did not lie. I started at Ben's (on one side of the street) and was kind of let down. Seemed like a pretty ordinary bike shop to me, other than a little more emphasis on hipster fixie stuff than I'm used to down here in RAGBRAI Central. Then, I crossed the street to MBC. Have you ever fallen in love with a bicycle at first sight? I'm talking totally smitten, "oh, you will be mine" cycle-lust? The orange MBC fixie in the window did that to me. In my defense, it was built around the massive tire/fender clearances of Tektro R556 brake calipers, so it would have been a sensible relationship, not just one based on physical beauty. I was able to leave the shop with my love unrequited, but not before we'd shared a few gentle caresses.

THE AFOREMENTIONED DECEMBERISTS CONCERT: Take one cool old theater (The Riverside -- a refurb'ed match to our classy old Hilton), throw my current cult favorite band on stage, and it's a sure-fire winner. Mix in a good opening act and great seats? We were so money, we didn't even know how money we were. The first set was the band's current concept/folk-rock-opera album The Hazards of Love (not nearly as pretentious as it sounds, really) in its entirety. Beginning to end. No breaks. One song relentlessly piling on to the next. From vocalist Shara Worden loosening the theater's plaster on "The Wanting Comes in Waves/Repaid" to the entire band taking up drums to accompany "The Rake's Song" in a blasting percussion chorus... absolutely stunning. And just when I thought, "Well, okay, but I can listen to that album at home," the band kicked off a very loose, fun second set, pulling a few gems out of the rest of the discography. In a bizarrely rocking twist, bandleader Colin Meloy started the acoustic guitar intro to Heart's "Crazy on You" -- I thought he was joking until the rest of the band kicked in and Worden and vocalist Becky Stark appeared on stage to again risk the building's structural integrity with an explosive take on the old gem. Perhaps one of the best concerts I've ever attended. Seriously.

MILWAUKEE ART MUSEUM: I am not the art geek of the family. That's Carla. But when a museum walks my feet off and still leaves me wanting more, that's saying something. We showed up right when it opened and got to see the sail-like roof unfurl with Lake Michigan in the background. Then it was off to gallery after gallery after gallery after gallery of one of the most diverse collections I've ever seen. Yummy lunch break in the museum restaurant, then MORE galleries... and galleries... and galleries. If there's a specific type of art you're really interested in, go there first. Carla saved the massive folk/outsider art collection for late in the day, and we almost didn't have the energy to finish it. I knew we were in the presence of greatness when my wife -- who devours lesser museums like dainty finger-sandwich appetizers -- turned to me after we'd seen about 75% of the place and said, "We have to stop now. My brain is full."

ALL THE REST: Didn't eat a bad meal the whole weekend, saw a bike culture of everything from fixie hipsters to everyday commuters wheeling around town that put Des Moines to shame, and -- save for one incident with a mystery missing exit -- didn't get lost once, nor did I ever have to pull a driving maneuver that caused someone else to curse Iowans. Honestly, it felt like I expect the Midwest to feel, only in city form -- kinda Minneapolis/St. Paulish, very comfortable despite its novelty. I'm not normally one for wanderlust, but within a couple days, I thought to myself, "I could see living here." And that's high praise.

(The side trip through Madison on the way home was fun too, but that's another story for another day...)

Good Rally... But Let's Follow Through

There was a rally on Wednesday riding down to the state capitol to raise awareness for bikers' rights on the road. If you like watching about 500 bikers go past a stationary camera to a soundtrack, be sure to check out the video of the event on YouTube.

I have to admit, after hearing that 500 people came out (I wasn't among them, due to the accumulation of several lame excuses), I was pretty darn impressed. Good start, Des Moines cycling community.

But what's next? It's not enough to crawl from West Des Moines to the golden dome in a 500-body amoeba, blocking traffic thanks to the Des Moines police escort that corked all the major intersections. You don't raise awareness with a one-time nuisance. Sure, our legislators saw numbers, but they'd already put up with a mob of d-bags with teabags that day, plus another mob whose marriages have apparently collapsed since our Supreme Court finally recognized the rights of all Iowans (take THAT, California! Iowa's more liberal than you! neener neener neener!) You think your poor state senator or rep had any energy left at the end of the day to be "aware" (or even placate via platitudes) a bunch of people out enjoying a bike ride in beautiful weather? Hardly.

So here's my proposal: Now that everyone's patted themselves on the back, I'll see all 500 of you out on the streets next week, and the week after that, and the week after that. Not in a lump, not with police protection. One at a time. Riding to work. Riding to the store. Riding to an I-Cubs game. Riding to a park. Just RIDING. Because if we really want to raise any awareness on the roads, that's what it's going to take. Drivers have to see bikers -- a LOT of bikers -- as a normal part of their day, traveling the streets like just another vehicle. It's not enough to put a "Share The Road" sticker on your roof rack and use it to drive your bike to our protected rail-trail sanctuaries.

I'll be out there. Will you?

Iowa Bikers: There's A Man Down

Doug Smith of Des Moines was run over by a truck towing two anhydrous ammonia tanks last weekend while out on a training ride, suffering a skull fracture and a broken pelvis.

More details are available from our local CBS affiliate, KCCI. Or, if you like your web news from a paper-pusher, there's the Des Moines Register story.

I love living and riding in Iowa. I've spent 14 years of my life here -- long enough that I actually think of myself an Iowan even though I wasn't born here. But reading some of the comments from our local mob of mouth-breathers made me want to move somewhere -- ANYWHERE -- else.

No matter where you ride, let's be careful out there. And Doug, even though we've never met, my thoughts are with you and your family. Here's hoping that your recovery is like a flat stretch of road with a strong tailwind.